I was very conscious that if I said ’yes’ my life would change in a radical way, says Bishop Paul Dempsey
At the age of 18, I made the decision to enter the seminary. Some might think, “God, that was a very young time to become a priest.” Of course, I wasn’t becoming a priest at that age – I was beginning a journey of discernment. Like many aspects of life, it’s about being open and having the courage to take that first step. Now, at 53, I understand that I am the youngest Bishop in Ireland.
I was born in Co. Carlow, into a very normal family. I’m the youngest in my family. I have a brother and two sisters. When I look back at my life, sometimes I wonder, “how in the name of God I ended up in the priesthood?” My parents were not theologians. They were very normal, ordinary people. My father came from businesspeople. My mother came from farming background. There are three things I remember from my childhood that I think are very significant on my Faith journey.
The first thing I remember is that we always went to Mass on a Sunday. That was a significant thing for us. On a Saturday night you’d have your bath. Believe it or not, we didn’t have daily showers. Your bath on a Saturday night was really important. Then your good clothes – we used to call them your ‘Sunday best’ – would be put out ready for Sunday morning. Then, you go to Mass with your family. Normally, we would have the Sunday roast together after. There was a lovely sense of family. Looking back now, in a sense, there was a significant message coming through to me as a child, ‘what was happening on Sunday morning was important’. I didn’t realise it at the time, but that was the message that was coming across. That was significant in the early stages of my Faith journey.
The second thing I remember is that when I would be going to bed as a child, my mom or my dad would bring me up to tuck me in and would say a little prayer. It was a simple little prayer. Might be, ‘God bless Mommy. God bless daddy. God bless my brother and my sisters. God bless the dog,’ the usual thing. You’re getting that sense of prayer being important. The lovely little prayer to my guardian Angel, I think, was the first prayer ever learned.
The third thing was seeing my mother praying, kneeling by her bedside in the morning. She had a little black prayer book. I think the witness of that was really important. Sometimes you might not realise the power that you have in witnessing before others. That’s where the seeds of Faith were sown in my life. It wasn’t from some big, complicated theological book.
I wanted to be a ‘Garda’. A policeman. We moved from Carlow to a town called Athy in Co. Kildare where there were two churches. There was the parish church, St Michaels, and there was the Dominican church, which was a most unusual church. It was built in the early 60s. Unfortunately, it’s a library now. But in my time, when I was a young boy, it was a church. We used to go to the Dominicans every Saturday evening. We didn’t go to the parish church. I was 11 years of age, wanting to be a Guard, wanting to be a policeman. There was a 6:15pm Mass in the Dominicans. My mother was one of these people that would have to go early to Mass because you want to get a seat down towards the back of the church. Typical Irish person. Sit down in the back. We had 15 minutes before Mass. The priest came out to say Mass. Fr Ray O’Donovan was his name. I probably didn’t even realise what he was saying. I was only 11. I remember looking up at him and something came over me. I don’t know what that was. To this day I can’t explain it, but something hit me during Mass. I recall looking up at Fr O’Donovan and saying, “there’s something about what he’s doing that I want to do with my life.” That was the seed of my vocation to the priesthood, because that thought never ever left me afterwards. I said it to my mother, who was a very wise woman, and she didn’t praise it nor knock it. She didn’t want influence to be one way or the other.
It was something that stayed with me during my secondary school years. I didn’t say it loudly to anybody. I did my Leaving Certificate when I was 17 years of age. I felt at 17 I was too young to go into the seminary. I worked for a year. But the niggling thing about the priesthood kept coming back to me. I decided to get in contact with the vocations director. We went through the talks. I was accepted for the priesthood. I joined the seminary at 18 years of age. I was only entering a discernment process to see if the priesthood was for me. I loved my formation. There’s the intellectual part: theology, philosophy, scripture. There’s also the pastoral end of things such as in my formation. I worked in Dublin, in hospitals, I worked in homeless hostels, in youth clubs as well. All sorts of different things, so it was a great formation for life.
There was another man with me. Paul was his name. We were going to be ordained together. He came to me towards the end of his formation and all he says is, “I don’t think the priesthood is for me.” He continued, “But I don’t regret the six years I spent in the seminary because it’s good formation for life.” He was open to the Lord in his formation. I did his wedding, and he’s married now over in the West of Ireland.
Ordained
I was ordained in July 1997 in the cathedral town of my home, Co. Carlow. I had studied for eight years for the priesthood. You’re kind of at the height of the ordination and the first Mass. Then, you wait for your first appointment. Where’s the bishop going to send you? I remember getting the phone call from the bishop on a Saturday morning to go down to see him. He said he was sending me to Clane, in Co. Kildare. I never lived on my own before. There wasn’t a sound in the house. This was all new to me. I remember thinking to myself, “Paul, you’ve made the biggest mistake of your life.”
What you learn from the richness of people’s experience is very powerful. God brings you into those moments with people on their life story, which is a great privilege”
Here I was ordained. You transition from being a student to seminarian. Now you’re a priest. I wasn’t too sure what I was supposed to do. I was only getting used to how to say Mass. September started up, schools opened, my ministry and service to people started up in relation to the weddings, the funerals, the baptisms. What you learn from the richness of people’s experience is very powerful. God brings you into those moments with people on their life story, which is a great privilege. I was seven years in Clane. I loved every minute of it. The most difficult part of my priesthood was moving from a parish. I had to leave Clane. You leave all the people you know and all the experience and hours to start off in another parish. I remember going into Kildare town as my second parish, feeling a little bit sorry for myself. The first morning had been a bit lonely. I didn’t know anybody. I remember walking down on the street. My head was down. I met a woman, and I looked up at her and she said “you must be Fr Paul. You’re welcome to the parish. We’re delighted to have you.” She said it with a big smile on her face. And on she went. She gave me such a lift in that moment.
Involved
Then I got into other areas of ministry that I never thought I would be involved with. I was appointed to look after youth ministry in Kildare and Leighlin dioceses. I was also appointed as Vocations Director for the dioceses and in local media. I was writing for local newspapers. I also got involved in local radio. I used to have an hour long show every Sunday morning on radio. I hadn’t a clue of any of that. I was on several World Youth days. Then I went on to be a curate in Naas. Then I went on to Newbridge in Co. Kildare.
‘Pope Francis has appointed you as Bishop of Achrony.’ All I remember was him kind of laughing because my face just fell. I had a sleepless night that night”
It came to December 2019, after saying the 9:30am Mass in Newbridge. I picked up the phone and a voice says, “Is that Fr Paul?” he continued, “this is Jude Okolo here, the Papal Nuncio. I would like to speak with you.” We arranged to meet that afternoon in Dublin. So up I went to Dublin. We went into a big sitting room. Small talk initially. Then he said, “You probably think you’re going to be put on the commission.” He continued, “Pope Francis has appointed you as Bishop of Achrony.” All I remember was him kind of laughing because my face just fell. I had a sleepless night that night. I was very conscious that if I say ’yes’, it was going to change my life in a radical way. I was going to have to leave Newbridge, which I loved. I was going to have to go to a different part of the country that I wasn’t familiar with. I also thought that people’s perception changes when you become a bishop.
All these things were going through my mind. I had to pray about it and think about it deeply. I thought of Pope Francis during that time. He was about to retire in Buenos Aires, in Argentina. He’s voted in by the Cardinals, by the Holy Spirit to become the Holy Father, and he accepted that. I was thinking to myself, “if Pope can take that all upon his shoulders of that responsibility. If he has the confidence that he wants to appoint me as a Bishop, then maybe I should say yes to the call.” I got back to the nuncio, and I said, “I accept the appointment.” Then you’re not allowed to say it to anybody until it’s publicly announced.
Announced
Towards the end of January 2020, it was announced publicly in the cathedral in Co. Roscommon. It is a rural diocese over in the West of Ireland covering a little bit of Roscommon, Mayo and Sligo. It’s a very different part of the country from what I was used to.
I was ordained bishop on August 30, 2020. We were still during COVID at that stage. It was another chapter, another beginning in my life. You’re trained to be a priest, but not to be a bishop. I had to get to know the priests and the people. They were most welcoming to me. I was trying to set up parish pastoral councils and parishes finance committees. Trying to get lay involvement more in the diocese, getting around visiting parishes, visiting schools, doing the confirmations. It was a wonderful experience.
I don’t know what the future holds. The Lord oversees tomorrow. That’s the same for us all on our own personal stories”
I was asked would I come to Dublin as an auxiliary Bishop. I was glad to say “absolutely”. I’ve always said yes to an appointment. I’ve never turned down an appointment. It has always worked out. We can all start off in a chapter analysis of all sorts of fears, like my fears about going over to the West of Ireland being a Bishop. But you could also say, “Lord, this is bigger than me. I’m handing it over to you.” There’s a plan there somewhere that we don’t see. I just started in Dublin a couple of months ago. Huge diocese. Huge number of priests. There are many challenges in Dublin. Of course there are. But there’s great things happening in Dublin too. I’ve been in different parishes every weekend and there’s fantastic things happening. Certainly, positive things.
I don’t know what the future holds. The Lord oversees tomorrow. That’s the same for us all on our own personal stories. I didn’t see it at the time, but the Lord was there.
To listen Bishop Dempsey’s full testimony go to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WMgaUGQZcHk&pp=ygUdcHVyZSBpbiBoZWFydCBpcmVsYW5kIGRlbXBzZXk%3D