Mindful Living
Meditation awakens us to the illusion of separateness. When we see only through the ego, everything becomes a competition, a comparison. It is all about ensuring my survival, my security, my salvation. But meditation awakens the heart and gives rise to a more expansive way of seeing. And when that way of seeing becomes embedded in us, it ultimately changes our way of being in the world.
We like to think that we respond appropriately to whatever circumstances we encounter in life, to what we see before us. But unless we truly see what is in front of us, unless we see with great clarity and accuracy, our response will be always be limited and inadequate to the situation.
We find ourselves reacting less and responding more to what any situation calls for”
Meditation teaches us that our conditioning gets in the way of seeing clearly. We freely choose to meditate with the intention of simply being in God’s presence. We commit to repeat our mantra from the start to the end of our period of meditation. Yet thoughts intrude. They invade the landscape of our consciousness revealing to us our preoccupations, our needs, our longings and we come to realise they all point ultimately to a desire for power, prestige and possessions. We discover that this is the lens through which we so often see the world.
But we discover too that the continual letting go of thought cleans the lens of our perception; as if every thought we let go is a smudge removed from the window through which we look at the world. Awareness of the problem slowly dissolves it and so meditation gives rise to greater clarity of perception which in turn leads to greater accuracy of response. We find ourselves reacting less and responding more to what any situation calls for.
Sikh activist
Valarie Kaur is a Sikh activist who has developed a very practical way to strengthen her capacity to see more clearly. She writes: “‘See no stranger’ has become a practice that defines my relationships… Seeing no stranger begins in wonder. It is to look upon the face of anyone and choose to say: ‘You are a part of me I do not yet know.’ Wonder is the wellspring for love. Who we wonder about determines whose stories we hear and whose joy and pain we share. Those we grieve with, those we sit with and weep with, are ultimately those we organise with and advocate for. When a critical mass of people come together to wonder about one another, grieve with one another, and fight with and for one another, we begin to build the solidarity needed for collective liberation and transformation—a solidarity rooted in love…”
What a wonderful mind-set to bring with you everywhere you go! As you encounter someone new or engage with someone who perplexes you, how helpful must it be to say to yourself: You are a part of me I do not yet know. Those who meditate will recognise that this is not an idle mantra, not a matter of trying to persuade yourself, but a deep recognition of what meditation teaches us; that we are intimately connected to everyone else – that our sense of separation arises when we see only with the ego but disappears when we learn to see with the heart also.
Love is like the sea. It’s a moving thing, but still and all, it takes its shape from the shore it meets, and it’s different with every shore”
As Valarie Kaur expresses it: “Through conscious repetition, I am practicing orienting to the world with wonder and preparing myself for the possibility of connection. (Sometimes I do this with animals and the earth, too!) It opens me up to pay attention to their story. When their story is painful, I make excuses to turn back—’It’s too overwhelming’ or ‘It’s not my place’—but I hold the compass and remember that all I need to do is be present to their pain and find a way to grieve with them. If I can sit with their pain, I begin to ask: What do they need? What is my role in this moment?”
In other words, before we act, we learn to ask: “How am I called to respond in this situation. What is the most loving response I can make right here, right now?” Sometimes, that might be silence. Or simply taking the hand of the other person or holding them in a silent embrace.
Zora Neale Hurston once wrote that “Love is like the sea. It’s a moving thing, but still and all, it takes its shape from the shore it meets, and it’s different with every shore”. I love the phrase, “it takes the shape of every shore it meets”. In other words, it meets you where you are and as you are – not as I might want you to be, but as you are right now. It makes me question how I love. Does my love adapt its shape to the contours of the other, to their shape rather than mine? The simple answer is, that unless we see clearly we cannot truly discern the shape we are called to be. And, to see clearly, we need a practice that can awaken the heart. And, the good news is that meditation does just that!